Saturday, February 25, 2023
Tuesday, February 21, 2023
“To educate a child perfectly requires a profounder thought, greater wisdom, than to govern a state.
The grand work of rearing children is not surpassed by any position, profession or station in life.”
And may I add, gives greater joy and satisfaction.
Here’s a list of six topics that are part of good parenting and will help children live to their fullest. This isn’t intended to be another “to do” list, but rather to inspire and give greater vision. I gleaned these from a lengthy chapter written by William Ellery Channing.
1. Morality
Teaching children to be moral beings is of prime importance. When a person looks into himself, he discovers two distinct kinds of principles, and comprehending them is so important. The child discovers desires, appetites, passions, which terminate in himself, which crave and seek his own interests above others. These desires focus on his own interest, gratification, and distinction.
But he also discovers another principle, an antagonist to these, and it is impartial, unselfish, universal enjoining on him to regard the rights and happiness of other beings and laying on him obligations which must be done, cost what they may, or however they may clash with his particular pleasure or gain.
2. Religion
When we look into ourselves, we discover powers which link us with this outward, visible, finite, ever-changing world. We have five senses to discern all the material of creation. And we also have a power which cannot stop at what we see and handle, at what exists within the bounds of space and time. There is something which seeks for the Infinite, Uncreated Cause, which cannot rest till it ascends to the Eternal, All-comprehending Mind. This we call the religious principle, and its grandeur cannot be exaggerated by human language. It is the essence of true religion to recognize and adore in God the attributes of Impartial Justice and Universal Love, and to hear Him commanding us in the conscience to become what we adore.
3. Intellectual
We cannot look into ourselves without discovering the intellectual principle, the power which thinks, reasons, and judges, the power of seeking and acquiring truth. And to gain truth, which is the great object of the understanding, I must seek it unselfishly, I must choose to receive the truth, no matter how it bears on myself. I must follow it no matter where it leads, what interests it opposes, to what persecution or loss it lays me open, from what party it severs me, or to what party it allies.
4. The Practical
The practical part of child rearing proposes as its chief end, to fit us for action; to make us efficient in whatever we undertake, to train us to firmness of purpose and to fruitfulness of resource in common life, and especially in emergencies, in times of difficulty, danger, and trial.
5. Beauty
When we look at our nature we discover, among its admiral qualities, the sense or perception of Beauty.
We see the germ of this in every human being and it should be enlarged and cherished in all. An infinite joy is lost to the world by the lack of culture and development of this spiritual endowment. Beauty in nature, and the mysterious charm found in the loveliness and grandeur of art and sculpture, in elevating literature and music.
6. The Power of Utterance
People are not made to shut up our minds to ourselves, but to give a voice and to exchange it with other minds. Speech is one of our grand distinctions from animals.
Our power over others lies not so much in the amount of thought within us, as in the power to bring it out.
A person who cannot open their lips without breaking a rule of grammar, without showing in his dialect or brogue or uncouth tones, his lack of cultivation; and having no clearness, grace or force of utterance or without darkening his meaning by a confused, unskillful mode of communication cannot take the place to which, perhaps, his native good sense entitles him.
Thursday, February 16, 2023
This is a for the married men who come home from work and neglect their wives and children.
The men who sit at the Xbox or the television while their wives continue working, cleaning, preparing children for bed and their husbands don't lift a finger to help.
I responded to one such woman who was a stay at home mother and also worked forty hours online from home, and when her husband comes home he flops down and neglects all the duties she attends to.
"I can't tell you how much it grieves me to hear stories like yours, and, sadly, they are all too common. But let me first answer the question "do all men act like this," and that is a resounding NO. I'm 76 years old, have four sons and six grandsons, so I'm going to write a letter to your husband now as if he were my son, and if you choose you can share it with him, I hope you do.
Hi son, I'm so disturbed because I listened to your wife's struggles today. She described her marriage to you and how it makes her feel and, frankly, it's as though she were describing a form of slavery not a marriage. She describes the marriage as though you are in control, the decision maker, the task master and the only one whose opinions and feelings count. She also describes your participation in rearing your child and caring for the house and the never ending chores that come with it, as little at best. In addition, your spiritual life has come to a standstill.
Let me be honest, if this is true, you are doing all you can to bring divorce to your door. And as you know, children of divorce are at high risk for drug abuse, suicide, depression, lower grades, lower income, risky behavior, failed relationships, and so many other things that contribute to a meaningless life if you divorce. Of course, each child will suffer to a different degree, some are like dandelions and will grow even under bad circumstances; but others are like violets, that require special circumstances and wilt with the first cold breath.
So forgive me if I urge you in the strongest terms possible, to invest in your own marriage. Working hard and holding down a good job is admirable, but that is not where it ends. Your day should end when your wife's day ends, and not a minute sooner. She is not a house-slave, expected to serve and clean up after you, and then on top of that care for your child full time and work on top of that???? You are equally responsible for her mental health, physical health, emotional health, romantic health and your child's well being. Countless millions have created happy marriages where both husband and wife thrive as people, look forward to each day, as well as the future. This is your most important task in life, everything else pales in comparison. Had you presented to her, before marriage, what she now has, do you think for a minute she would have said yes? Of course not, we all want to have time for ourselves, a loving romantic life, times of quiet and reflection, times to have healthy recreation, hobbies and goals we are working towards.
Whatever you do, don't fall into the trap of reducing life to work only, where neither of you are growing as people, and enjoying life together. Will you fail at the most important thing in life? I know you can do better, and should do better; and if you continue to hold Kingship and control, it won't be long before you will reduce your marriage to the intolerable, and divorce will be the predictable outcome.
I know you can do much better, if in fact you care enough. So, work along side of your wife until the days work is done; enjoy your child with her, and then when the child's bedtime comes, spend time together talking and planing how each of you can enhance one another's lives on every level, spiritually, emotionally, physically, and watch the love grow! You will respect yourself far more and so will your wife. Happy homes are worth every minute of effort to build, and nothing compares to a happy home. ------------ So that gives you some idea of what I would say to my own adult sons if they had failed so miserably. God bless you, I hope something in this hits the mark.
Thursday, February 09, 2023
Wednesday, February 08, 2023
When I saw this picture I knew I had to share it, but, what is it that strikes me so???
I shared this with two friends to get their thoughts and with their collaboration this is what I came up with --
Inside every man is seasons.
Inside everyman is a boy trying to grasp the beginnings of his walk.
His personality will be formed by age 5.
His body will change dramatically before 15.
His eyes will watch.
His ears will see.
He will grow so fast at times, that his physical will struggle with his mental.
Then his mental will struggle.
And back again.
But a man becomes a man when he is able, be he 5 or be he 75.
Now the apostle Paul speaks of another man, the "old man" the corrupt man that is self absorbed, shirks responsibility and lives for pleasure, and that man, the "old man," may be our first beginnings, but Christ renews our mind and we become a new creature, and "We shall mount up with wings like eagles, we shall run and not be weary.."
I think that is what I see most clearly in this picture, the renewing.
"We often ask the question, Why does God permit so much sin and evil in the world?
The visitor walking the sidewalks of a downtown city amid scenes of moral misery, or the philanthropist threading his way through paths of deep pollution, or the home missionary coming into contact with forms of life that would make angles weep -- all put the question to their heart, Why doesn't God intervene?
And to each there ought to be one answer: He does interfere, He does intervene, He is at this moment interfering; He is interfering through YOU.
This is exactly what the Apostle Paul says: "God has given to us the ministry of reconciliation."
This is a thing we seldom think of in our pessimistic moments. We often exclaim at the sight of flagrant evil, "I wish I were in God's place for one day!"
Little do we deem that his is exactly what God wishes too. God has asked us to stand in His place, not for one day, but for many days.
He has asked us to take up His burden - the burden of human sin. He has asked us to interfere fro Him, to act for Him, to strive for Him, to love for Him."
George Matheson.