The longer I work with people that struggle with life, the more clearly it becomes that early childhood is where most of the work of parenting is done. The following quote is a significant part.

Self soothing -- Children who have suffered childhood trauma can be without the inner function of self-soothing, that is they cannot calm or comfort themselves by calling up a mental image of a secure relationship with a parent or caretaker. One of the skills a young child must learn is to comfort himself when he is upset. One way he learns to do this is by being soothed by his parents or caregivers. Touch and holding are two ways caregiver’s comfort children. Gradually the child learns ways to calm himself. These activities are critical for the healthy development of the young child.

When a child has suffered chronic complex trauma, they may have difficulty regulating emotions and may have symptoms like persistent sadness, suicidal thoughts, explosive anger or passive aggressive anger.