The following quote about choosing a mate that sees and values the good and virtuous in you is such good advice.
"Is your friend such a one that an increase of worth on your part will rarely make her more your friend? Is she retained, --- is she attracted, --- by more nobleness in you, --- by more of that virtue which is peculiarly yours; or is she indifferent and blind to that? Is she to be flattered and won by your meeting her on any other than the ascending path? Then duty requires that you separate from her." Thoreau, painting by Sir Lawrence Alma-Tadema.